So it has finally happened!!

After 2 home pregnancy tests and a trip to the doctor to confirm, we finally believed that I was indeed pregnant!!

We were so EXCITED!! And of course started thinking of ways we would tell our parents. And Joey decided that there was no way he was going to tell them over the phone, so we splurged and bought plane tickets home!! One of the best splurges ever and so glad that Joey took the initiative and did this!!

Joey, also came up with the awesome idea of how we were going to tell our parents that we were having a baby!! So lucky to be married to a wonderful and creative man!!

And 2 weeks after we found out, we were on a plane heading home to surprise our parents with not only a surprise visit, but with some very exciting news that they were going to be grandparents!!!

Thanks to Holly, as she was the only one who knew we were coming home and for keeping it a secret! And anyone who knows Holly, knows this can be a challenge! But she did it and was our chauffeur. So thanks again Holly!!!

So Holly, first brought us to my mom's work where we surprised, did not tell her anything just surprised her!! And she was surprised and it was so fun to see the look on her face!

After that we borrowed her car and headed over to Mom and Dad Ross's house! Where Joey called them and asked if they wanted to play a game of sequence and surprise there we were on their deck! Again, completely shocked and wish we could of had our camera ready to snap pictures of the shocked look on their faces!!!

Mom and Dad Ross were the first ones we shared our exciting news with! Joey's idea was to show them pictures of when they visited and just some other more recent pictures! And of course the last picture we showed them was this one:

Once this picture was on the screen of the tv, it got so quiet, that I looked at Joey like um what if they don't get it??? And he just shrugged his shoulders and before he could say anything his mom started to cry and his dad was like "really??"
Many hugs and tears were shared! It was a very special moment and they reacted in a way I never would of imagined as this will be their 5th grandchild!!! But they were so happy for us and so excited!!

After we spent some more time with the Ross's, we were on our way to tell my sister Katy and her fiance Brandon! We wanted to tell them in a different way, a more careful way because I am due on June 2nd and they are getting married on June 18th. So we just wanted to sit down with them and explain that no matter what happens we are going to try our best to be there for their big day!! I want nothing more than to be there and to share in their special day.I mean my goodness my baby sister is getting married and I can't imagine not being there!! So hopefully all our prayers will be answered and everything will work out and we will be there new baby and all!

After talking with them we went home to surprise my dad when he got home from work! It was decided that since one of the first things my dad does when he gets home on Fridays is head to the bedroom to get ready to go to the gym. Well, when he walked in his room to get ready, he had a mighty big surprise waiting for him in his bed-JOEY!!
My mom, Holly, and I were hiding in their bathroom, so I was able to get a picture of the shocked look on his face!

Being able to get this picture was key because it was an excuse to show them the pictures!! And as soon as my mom saw the picture, she was like "I just knew it!"

Both Joey and I knew she would figure something was up when she saw us and she was right! Lots of excitement was in the air!!

The rest of the weekend was spent with both of our families and sharing the news with everyone else!
The best was my grandma who we had to explain the picture to because she thought the dogs were having a baby! Haha

We went home back to Texas completely exhausted, but more than anything we came home very excited and feeling that this was for real now that we got to share it with our families!


I am officially into my 2nd trimester, as I am 14 weeks and 2 days!!
Yipee!
Hopefully this now means I will start to feel better and enjoy the fact that I have this little miracle growing inside me!

Here are some pictures of our 1st trimester ultrasound of our little squirt!!!

Our new doggy-Molly Girl!!!

On August 14th, Joey and I woke up and had ourselves an ordinary Saturday morning. We drank coffee, played sequence, and talked about what we were going to do that day. One of the things we needed to do was to take Duke to the vet for a check up on his sprained tail and get a shot. Dukes vet is at Petsmart and that Saturday the 2nd Chance Humane Society just happened to be there with adoptable dogs.

While we were waiting to see the doctor, Joey had to go to the bathroom and when he came back he was like you have to go look at a lab back there. So of course I did and we both got all excited and decided as soon as we were finished with the vet we would go back together and look.

When we went back to look, Joey had never seen the shiny black lab that I had my eye on. So we looked at the other lab he saw originally, but something kept bringing us back to the black lab they had named Lindey. So we asked if we could walk around with her and see how her and Duke got a long. Well we ended up spending 2.5 hours walking around with both dogs discussing what we should do. At one point we gave her back and said we needed more time to think about it, but for some reason unknown we could not leave the store or stop staring at her. In the end she won our hearts over and we went home that day with another dog.

We decided to change her name to Molly, since Lindey was a name that was just given to her when she was brought to the humane society and she did not respond to it at all. They said she was brought in by someone who found her on the side of the road and thought she was about 9-10 months old. Well, that night we found out she was a little younger than that because while we were watching the two dogs play we saw that Duke had blood on him. Once we realized he was fine and that the blood had come from Molly's mouth because she was still losing teeth, we realized that there was no way she could be older than about 6 months old! The vet agreed as well that she was about that age.

Molly is a completely different dog than Duke. One word to describe her would be "CRAZY". She is just a bundle of energy and we found ourselves comparing her to Duke constantly. They are just completely different dogs. Duke is totally a Daddy and Momma's dog, he likes to be with us, wants to please us, gets excited when he gets to go places with us, he is just such a good dog. Where Molly is completely opposite. Molly is a free soul, she likes to wander around, she is super stubborn, when she is up she is full of energy and can't sit still, and nothing really seems to phase her.

We found ourselves getting stressed out with her because she was so different. And it wasn't until someone finally said to us, "you know the dogs are going to be just like your kids will be, different from each other. Did you really expect to get another Duke?"

When we stopped and thought about that question we realized that, yeah we did expect to get another Duke. And then we realized how ridiculous we were for thinking that. Once we realized that and started to accept Molly for who Molly is, our stress level has gone down and we have begun to enjoy her much more. And realized she is just as great of a dog as Duke just in a different way!

Having Molly now for over 1.5 months, she has completely stolen not only our hearts but Duke's as well as they have become best friends. I honestly can't imagine life without Molly in it! She is our new addition!

But to all those out there wondering when we are going to stop with the dogs and have real kids.

(Mom this question is for you)

I did tell Joey that we can't get anymore dogs until we move to a bigger house with a bigger yard and mostly because I want a baby now!! So no more 4 legged friends for what I hope is a long while as we have our hands full with the two we have. Hopefully in the near future I will be blogging about a new addition that doesn't have four legs!!

How could I forget???

We now have been living in Texas for over a year! Hard to believe but we have! And living in Texas you must attend these 2 things to really understand Texas living! And I forgot to mention it in my last post when I was updating!

First, we have gone to our first Friday Night Lights in the good old state of Texas where football is everything! It was almost like we were at a college game, just not quite as big! Football down here is everything and we learned that when we attended a game with my MaMa (aka Mrs. Ferrell). High school football games that we attended when we were in high school can't even compare. Just on the visitors side there were probably as many people as what a North/South game would have total! It was very easy to get caught up in all the excitement and we look forward to another Friday Night Lights game!!!

Us with the Ellison Eagle Mascot!!! We are so lucky to have gotten this picture!! Ha

And the second thing I forgot to mention was we went to our first Texas Rodeo. It was probably the most fun thing we have done in awhile!

The rodeo was so fun,

there was music playing,

Ice cold BEER,

A crazy clown that really did nothing but be a comedian,

Little kids riding sheep,

COWBOYS (HOT)

Cowboys riding the bulls

AND

Best of all I got to share these fun memories with my best friend and husband!

Thanks Joey for making these memories possible!

I am loving this adventure we are on!!!

Been awhile....

Since Joey has been home, everything seems to be a whirlwind of activities! Time is just flying by. I wish time would of gone this fast when he was gone and would slow down a bit now that he is home!
But I am so thankful he is home and that we are able to be a family again!

Here is an update of what we have been up to:

~Joey and Duke reconnected and I believe their bond is even tighter now

~A new addition has been added to the Ross Family: Molly (a black lab)

~We traveled home to Wisconsin where we got to enjoy:

**Both of our families

**Got to see Katy in her wedding dress and she looked BEAUTIFUL (can't believe she is getting married) and tried on a bunch of bridesmaid dresses! Can't wait till their very special day!
**Went up north for almost a week, which was just what we needed. It was just Joey, Duke, and I getting to go to our favorite place together and just spend much needed alone time together with no demands put on us! Thank you Mom and Dad Ross for letting us be able to enjoy the cabin...we are very blessed!

**Enjoyed a very fun night with some great friends! Thank you Roeder's for letting us come and hang out! Eli is way to cute for his own good!

**D got to meet his new Momma! Holly and D both seem to be enjoying each other and we are very glad we were able to give D to a good home! Holly will be a great Momma to my little man!

**My parents threw us a great party where we got to hang out with some family and friends. It was so great to see everyone and so nice that we did not have to go chasing to see everyone! Thanks Mom and Dad for such a great party, it meant a lot to us that you did it!

~We have been taking many trips to the Lake to help cool us all off as it is still very warm out

~Met some new friends

~Been working on the house a lot-Joeys big project is painting the trim on the outside of the house! Looks so much better so far! Pictures will come when it is all finished!

~We have started watching the show the office and have become quite addicted and perhaps it is our new favorite show!

~I am back to work and so far it has been a very busy year!

AND

~We just had a WONDERFUL visit from Mom and Dad Ross! Great to see them and spend time with them, but very hard to say goodbye!

He's Home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, Joey has officially been home now for almost a month and a half and it is WONDERFUL!!

The estimated arrival dates for Joey to arrive were June 19-20 and AMAZINGLY he arrived about 11:30 p.m. Saturday, June 20th! And if you know anything about how the military works you understand why I find this to be amazing!!

At about 3:00 pm that afternoon though I received a text and it was Joey.

First, I was so excited, I had been waiting for the moment for 4 months and then it came way sooner then I thought! I did not expect to hear from him until the later evening sometime, so I was completely shocked to see I had a message from him saying he was in Maine and would call shortly!

He was STATESIDE!!!!! Very exciting moment for me!

Another very exciting moment was hearing his ring tone when he called me for the first time. I know these are all silly things but they are also things that when you don't have them anymore you miss them! He had a cell phone again, which meant I could contact him now whenever I wanted. I have not had total access to him for 4 months and it was exciting to get it back!

At about 10 p.m. I got another text saying they have landed. It was exciting to know that not only were we in the same country but now the same city together. It was getting closer, but I had to contain myself as I knew it would be another hour to hour and half before I would actually get to see him. One of the most exciting moments of the night was when the D.J. said here come the buses and there they were!!

By the time the everything was all said and done it was after 11:30 by the time we finally got to reunite. Unfortunately because I was all by myself I did not have anyone to take pictures of us once we were reunited, but I do have a video of the ceremony which I think is pretty cool and am glad that we have it.

Here is the ceremony!

(It is dark but you can still get a good idea of what happened)

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Here is also the video of when Joey and Duke reunite! It is again dark but so sweet at how excited he got. The video doesn't really do it justice because Duke was so excited, hard to describe, but the video gives you a good idea! Turn up the volume because you can here Dukey cry!

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Both Duke and I are so happy to have him home!

I feel different, happier and I can tell Duke is too!

Our family is complete again!

AND

Our house is finally is starting to feel like home.

So close......

As the reunion with Joey is literally right around the corner, I am filled with so many different emotions! One of those feelings is disbelief that this not so fun chapter in our lives is just about over!
Thank you God!

But the main emotion I am filled with is pure excitement! I can't wait to have my husband, lover, and my BEST FRIEND back! When I think of seeing him that first time, my heart starts to thump like crazy and my stomach gets all jittery causing the butterflies to go nuts!

There are so many things that I get so excited about when thinking he will be home shortly. Things that I have missed so very much. Even those little things that sometimes get on my nerves, I can't wait to get back!

I have missed:

~his presence to fill the house and make it feel like home
~sitting next to him in the car
~cooking real meals
~eating dinner with him
~enjoying a glass of wine at dinner
~him putting me to bed at night
~sharing a bed with him
~watching him play with Duke
~going out to dinner with him
~his laugh
~his silliness all the time
~watching Sportscenter all the time
~taking walks at night
~going with him on his runs
~shopping for him
~reading in bed with him
~his hugs
~the way he always makes me feel special and loved

AND

~EVERYTHING!!!!!!


But I would be lying if I did not say I was also nervous about him coming home as well! It has been a little over 3.5 months since I have last seen him and a lot has happened since that time. I know I have changed and I am pretty sure he has too, how could he of not. Which is not unusual because everyone changes with time. But most married couples change together, but we have changed separately on completely different continents with limited communication.

So yeah I am nervous! I have a lot to lose! But I also feel like this is normal to have feelings like this.

I also believe in our love and so whenever I begin to feel real nervous I am reassured not only by him, but by his love for me! So whatever happens and no matter how much we may have changed I am confident we will be okay! Because giving up on a love like ours just would be down right silly!

So on Sunday morning when most of the country is sleeping soundly in their beds, I will hopefully be reuniting with the man I love more than anything in this world!
His arms better be ready to catch me as I jump into them!!

Happy 1st Birthday Duke

On June 1st, 2008, Duke's mom Lacey gave birth to 10 little puppies and one of them was our very own Dukey!

Duke is the one all by himself, I had just laid him down. All the dogs with collars are taken, including Duke with his army collar on!

On June 1st, Duke was not even a thought in our minds. Sure we talked about getting a dog, a lab, but not until we were more settled.

At this time in our lives I was ending up another school year and we were preparing for Joey to leave again to go to Washington for about 40 days.

Joey left towards the end of June and a day after he left I sat at my parents house looking at the Sheboygan Press. My whole intention of looking at the press was to look at the classifieds for jobs. I knew I needed something to do to keep me busy while Joey was gone or I would go crazy. I already was having a hard time and it had only been a day that he was gone. Well before I got to the job postings I decided to just check out the animal section of the classifieds. And what do I see....yellow lab puppies for sale! I of course got sidetracked and the job hunting never happened. Instead I got all the information about the puppies for when Joey called. While I was waiting for Joey to call I went into complete research mode in finding out what it would take to bring a dog to Korea, which at the time was where we thought we were going to go after San Antonio.

By the time Joey called I was prepared with all the information and knew I could pretty much handle any questions he would have. He of course was all for this and told me go look at them.

We both knew though that if I went I was going to leave with picking our Duke out. And sure enough that weekend my parents, Katy, and I went to go check out the pups. And after an hour of hanging out with the male pups that were available I picked out Duke. We put his collar on and I put a deposit down. We were now owners of a yellow lab puppy!

I was not able to take him home that day because he was only 5 weeks old and still needed his Mom, so I had 3 weeks to prepare for our little guy!

(The day I picked Duke out!)

I remember the day I picked him up, July 14th. Joey was not home yet and would not be for a couple of weeks. So my mom, Katy, and I went to go get our little guy. I was a bundle of nerves. The moment was bitter sweet because as excited as I was to get Duke, I was also a little sad that Joey was not home to share in this moment with me. But looking back now I realize that being an army wife I might have more moments just like that. Because when everything is all said and done the Army owns Joey and if the country needs him he goes!

Anyways, on the way home Duke fell asleep in my arms. And I was like okay this is going to be easy. Not so much! That night I was up every hour, getting pretty much no sleep at all and Duke was feisty. I of course was so tired and emotional and cried to my mom that I picked out an aggressive dog. Well I was reassured he was just being a puppy. But later that week I went to Petsmart and got Duke signed up for puppy class. Best thing I ever did. Those classes are totally for the owners and they are awesome because I learned so much. And Duke is a great dog now because of those classes! Otherwise I am pretty certain we might have had a Marley on our hands!

(Joey and Duke meet for the first time in the Green Bay Airport parking lot!)

As I am writing this and thinking back to that time, it seems like we have had Duke forever. Hard to picture life before Duke.

I feel in love with Duke the day I picked him out, but never thought I would love him as much as I do. He is truly a blessing to us!

He especially has a special place in my heart because he is always with me! He is my constant companion. I can honestly say that he is a huge part of how I have made it through this deployment. Without him I don't think I could have stayed here in Texas. But because I had him to come home to every night I was able to do it.
And looking back he has gotten me through so much. Including when I first got him, he got me through that time Joey was gone, he got me through our time in San Antonio when Joey was gone a lot, and now through this deployment. Some people may say that we are crazy to love an animal as much as we do but I can bet that those people never had a dog like Duke and never have been through some of the stuff we have. And before we had Duke I probably would of said the same thing. But Duke is a constant companion and loves us no matter what. He brings us so much joy and happiness! Words can't even begin to describe what he means to us and all the happiness he brings us!

So thank you Duke! We love you so much!

Here are some of my favorite pictures of our Duke!

Instant best friends!

Practicing "LEAVE IT"

Duke got a pool to splash around in this summer and he happened to get it around his birthday!!


I honestly believe if humans were just a little more like dogs, who love unconditionally, the world would be a much better place!!

1st group is HOME!!!!

The first group of soldiers from Joey's unit have arrived!!!

On Saturday evening I went to help get all the last minute signs and flags set up for the Welcome Home Ceremony that was held early Sunday morning. Two of the wives that were helping, their husbands were coming home on this flight and they got a phone call from their husbands telling them that they were in Maine and were finally stateside! It was so exciting to hear that and I was just so excited for them. I can't wait for that moment to happen that I see Joey's name pop up on my phone! Something as little as that just gives me butterflies in my stomach!

I was able to go home for a bit in between the setting up and the ceremony. But arrived back at 10:30 pm Saturday night. The soldiers were due to arrive in Killeen at 11:48 and they were right on time! At about that time the D.J. stopped the music and annonced that our loved ones have LANDED!! Everyone started screaming.
It is giving me chills as I am writing this because it was just so EXCITING. It is really hard to find words to explain the feelings and emotions I was feeling. And it wasn't even Joey coming home!

Once they have landed they do all their improcessing and turn in their weapons at the airfield before they come to us. This ended up taking about one and half hours. Than when the D.J. annouced that they had left the airfield and were on their way the anticpation of their arrival just excillated.
And about twenty minutes later we hear "15th STB family and friends here come your loved ones!!"

And than you see all the buses pulling up!

AHHHHHH~I just instantly started crying. It was just such a flow of emotions that words just really can't describe! And it wasn't even Joey on those buses!

Once they were all formed up we were told to yell, "MOVE THE BUSSES" and when they moved there they all were!

They marched forward with the Honor Guard leading them and all I can say is WOW! Words can't even describe the feelings that were going through me.


There were two very short speeches, one given by Col. Phelps who ended his speech with saying, "The only thing standing between your loved one and you is ME and I say GO GET THEM!"
And everyone was off!

Another very emotional moment. I got to just sit back and watch people reunite with their loved ones. It was such a special moment, there are really no words to describe this entire night/morning, except for BEAUTIFUL!

Here are some pics of people reuniting!

Can't wait to reunite with my soldier!!!!!!

It's official!!

Well as of yesterday I received a call from Joey's unit to tell me that Lieutenant Ross is expected to be home the week of June 14th! So I guess I can say it is official (well as official as anything can be when you are dealing with the army) since I have finally heard it from the unit.

Honestly, I can't wait so I can't even begin to imagine how some of the wives are feeling whose husbands have been gone for a lot longer then Joey has! So because I am so excited I have to keep myself even more busy because otherwise all I do is think about it and I get even more excited. But I have to keep reminding myself that I still have a month to go yet.

All I know though is that I hope that the rest of the time goes even faster then it already is. And I know I should not be wishing my life away like this, but without my husband here to share thing with, life is just not the same! Once he comes back then life can move slowly again!

It is not a muzzle!!

This is not a muzzle, it is called a gentle leader. It is to help prevent the dog from pulling. If you see a dog wearing this, don't be afraid because it has nothing to do with the dog being viscous. This will not prevent a dog from biting a person!

This is by far one of the best inventions ever. Because Duke is so strong it is almost impossible for me to walk him without this. And because Duke is so STUBBORN, he still can pull me, but I just have more control.

Duke absolutely hates the gentle leader and usually hides in a corner when he sees me bring it out. While on our walks or runs he attempts several times to get it off, but is not successful. I feel bad about putting it on sometimes, but even though he hates having it on, his tail wags like crazy the entire time we are walking or running.

I am hoping that the older Duke gets, he will put 2 and 2 together and figure out that if he stops pulling he will not have to wear it. But that will probably take awhile especially because he is so stubborn.
Until that happens though he will continue to have to wear this because I don't want to end up with another broken arm from walking a dog! And Duke needs to be exercised to keep him out of trouble!

Grace in Small Things

#1. A busy week at work! Love that because the week just flies by and that brings me one week closer to Joey coming home! We are now under the 50 day mark-Yippee!

#2. Talking to Joey at his brigade via video conference. It was so great to see him, but very diffcult to say good-bye!

#3. We are now in May and I can finally say that Joey will be home next month!! Can't wait!!!!!!!!

#4. Cutting the grass with Duke. He is my little helper and it tires him out because he is running all around! Here is a picture of his paws all grass stained!


#5. Getting up 3 times to run before work! I had a super busy week and was exhausted by the the time Friday came, but very proud of myself for pushing myself to get up!

#6. Thursday night T.V. I love that night and then the next day is Friday!

#7. Going to the Chiropractor. My neck does not feel as tense anymore.

You never know what path life may take you on.....

When I was a little girl, I used to imagine what life for me would be like when I grew up. And I think like most little girls, I used to dream about what it would be like to fall in love and marry that one person that you just absolutely cannot live without! Then the older I got I wondered if that dream would really come true and if there really was that one guy out there for me.

Well at age 25 little did I know that my soul mate would be a guy I happened to be pretty good friends with for awhile. Joey and I met on a church retreat back when I was 17 years old. Little did I know that when I met him, he would be the man of my dreams and the man I marry. I remember having a crush on him then and several other times during our friendship, but never acted on it. I was way to shy. But New Years Eve 2007 was the magical night that we became Joey and Melissa. It just happened, looking back I see now that things were building before that night, but just never wanted to admit it.

Now after being married to him for almost a year and half, looking back at that night still gives me butterflies. I wish I could bottle up that moment forever so that it never fades. That night to me was one of the most perfect nights I have ever had.

What brings this up is that today I got to see Joey for the first time since he has left for Iraq. They offer this video telephone conference to families to help them stay in touch when one is deployed. Well I took full advantage of it this morning. I woke up at 4:30 a.m. just a bundle of nerves just like I was when Joey and I first started dating.

Obviously, things are much different now, we are married but our marriage is not the typical marriage you imagine having when you are a little girl. In the entire three and half years we have been together, we have also been apart quite bit. We of course hate it, but the one positive that being apart brings is that we really end up appreciating each other and what we have. At times in our relationship I know I have taken things for granted. And it wasn't until we were apart for the first time for a good amount of time did I realize this. Now the saying, "you don't know what you have until it's gone," really hits home.

Well this morning, as I waited until it was time for me to leave to go to our meeting, I was just a bundle full of nerves. I was excited, nervous, insecure, and had a stomach full of butterflies at the thought of getting to see him. And when I first saw him he took my breath away and I just started to cry. I knew I missed him without having to see him, but seeing him just made me realize just how much I miss him. It was so great to see him and once my nerves calmed, we had a great 30 minutes. And just like that new years night I wanted to bottle up this moment too.

As I have finally started to adapt to Joey being gone, I have found a routine and so far it is working to help pass my days until he comes back home to me. But, as great as it was to see him, it was also very hard. Seeing him just made me miss him even more if that is possible. And as my morning went on, I could feel myself deflating. It was almost like I was back to ground zero again, trying to figure out how to go on without him here with me. And honestly, today I did not do a very good job of staying strong, today I hid. Until tonight I just got sick of myself and decided that I was not being fair to Duke. So as hard as it was, I got myself out of my P.J's put on some workout cloths and took Duke to this school by our house to play fetch in the huge field. It felt great because he was just so excited, which made me realize why I have to be strong because not only does Joey need me, but so does Duke. Everyday is a struggle and this is by far one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I will keep on fighting. Because everyday that passes is one day closer to Joey returning home.

So back to being a little girl and dreaming of the man I would marry someday and the life we would live. I can honestly say I never imagined I would be living the life I am, but Joey is just the man I hoped and dreamed I would marry someday. Now this next month and half needs just just hurry on by so I can get the man of my dreams back home where he belongs!

My little sister is ENGAGED!!

So after dating Brandon for almost 4 years, Katy got engaged this past Sunday! As we were all kinda of expecting it to happen, I still am in shock. The reason being is she is my baby sister and I remember the day she was born and now she is engaged to be married! Feels like not to long ago I was riding my bike around the neighborhood passing out pink gum cigars announcing her arrival. And now I am announcing her engagement!

Even though I am still kinda in a state of shock, I am so VERY happy for the two of them! Katy couldn't of found a better man to become her husband! Even though I have thought of Brandon as part of our family already, its nice to make it official.

Congratulations to you both! Can't wait to share in this very special experience with you guys! Enjoy every moment of it, even the planning, because it goes by way to fast!

We love you both!

My fingers are crossed...

Along with lots of praying, I am keeping my fingers crossed that the news of Joey coming home earlier then August will actually happen. The news is that the last flight to leave Iraq is July 1st. So I am praying, hoping, wishing, and keeping my fingers crossed that this will happen.

But I am also being careful not to get my hopes up to high because I can't forget that I am dealing with the army and anything can change! Nothing is set in stone when it comes to the military!

But I will continue to pray and keep my fingers crossed!

And

We will see what happens.................

Letter to a military spouse

While I have never had the pleasure of meeting you or your husband, I felt the need to write you and express a very deep feeling that I have in my heart.

I, as a person, am not brave. I do not tackle things head on, as I hate confrontation. I will travel 100 miles out of my way just to avoid a conflict. I am an American woman that has no idea what is going on in the military other than what I hear on the news.

I have never had to let go of someone so that they could go fight for people that they didn't know, people that sometimes do not appreciate or understand what they are fighting for.

I have never had a sleepless night of worry because of a report that another bomb has exploded and I still haven't heard from my husband.

I have never had to wait for months on end to hold the one that I loved so.

I have never had to tell my children that daddy wasn't coming home tonight because he was so far away fighting for something that they aren't yet old enough to understand.

I have never had to hold my head high and suppress the tears as I hear that it will be at least another six months of separation before my loved one gets to come home.

I have never had to deal with a holiday away from the one that I thought I would share every day of my life with.

And I have never had to feel the panic rising in my heart at the sound of a ringing phone or knock at the door for fear that it is the news that everyone is terrified of getting.

For the reasons listed above, I can not tell you that I understand how you feel. I can not tell you that you must be strong. I can not say that you shouldn't be angry, because you "knew what you were getting into when you married a military man". I can not say these things because I have never had to walk in your shoes.

What I can say for certain is that because of your unselfish acts of bravery and your husbands willingness to stand up for those who see him as "just another soldier" - - I will never have to walk in your shoes.

I do understand that as a military wife you are expected to uphold a certain amount of control, but I never understood how you could do it, until now. I have figured out that you are not like other women. You are of a special breed. You have a strength within you that holds life together in the darkest of hours, a strength of which I will never possess. The faith you have is what makes you stand out in a crowd; it makes you glow with emotion and swell with pride at the mention of The United States of America.

You are a special lady, a wonderful partner and a glorious American.

I have more respect for your husband than I could ever tell you, but until recently I never thought much about those that the soldier leaves at home during deployment.

Until this moment I could never put into words exactly what America meant to me.

Until this moment, I had no real reason to.... Until I heard of you.

Your husband and his military family hold this nation close, safe from those who wish to hurt us...but you and those like you are the backbone of the American family. You keep the wheels in motion and the hearts alive while most would just break completely down. Military families make this nation what it is today.

You give us all hope and you emit a warming light at the end of a long dark tunnel.

Because of you and your family...I am able to be me. I am able to have my family. I am able to walk free in this great land. Because of you and your family, I can look ahead to the future with the knowledge that life is going to be okay. Because of you and your family, I can awake to a new day, everyday.

I realize that you are a stronger person than I will ever be because of these things and I just wanted to take the time today to say thank you to you and your family for allowing me that freedom.

I will never be able to repay this debt to you, as it is unmatchable. However, I hope that you know that no matter where you are...what you are doing...what has happened today...or what will happen tomorrow...Your husband will NEVER be "just another soldier" to me.... And you, dear sweet lady, will never be forgotten.

You are all in my prayer's everyday and I pray that God will bring you back together with your loved one safely.

May God Bless You!

(Author Unknown)

Grace in Small Things

So I have Raina and Sarah to thank for giving me this idea. I love reading about the small things in life that help them get through each day and week. Right now with Joey being gone I tend to find myself being more negative then usual. I am hoping this will help me focus more on the positive things going on our lives.

1. Joey~ I am so grateful to have in my life. He is a hero and I am so incredibly blessed to not only have him as my husband but as my best friend as well!

2. I love coming home everyday to Duke. I am so grateful that I don't have to come home to an empty house every night. Instead I come home to a very energetic dog who no matter what is always happy to see me! He gives me something to do and gets me out of the house even when I would rather just hide in bed all day. He has no idea how much he is loved and just how important he is to us. Can't imagine life without him.

3. Our families~who are far away but are constantly checking in with me making sure I am okay. I look forward to their phone calls everyday even when they are really short. Having their support means the world to me!

4. My weekly cards from Joey's mom just letting me know that they are thinking and praying for me. Love them!

5. Work~I am so grateful that I am able to go to work everyday and stay busy. Not only do I get to work with amazing kids, but I have made such great friends who have helped me in more ways then they will ever know!

6. Waking up or coming home to an email from Joey! During the week this is our only form of communication because our schedules are so different with the time change. It usually makes my day. I don't think he even realizes just how important those emails are to me, even when they are super short, all that matters is that I have heard from him!

I have lots to be thank-full for, even during a time like this when Joey and are separated. It definitely sucks that he is not here, but we are getting through it together by staying strong for each other and with lots of support from our families and friends.

This day can pass right on by.....

Half of my heart is deployed.
~Author Unknown

Seeing everyone with their families today has been really difficult for me. Makes me miss Joey even more then I already do. It is hard knowing that I am here, he is there, and our families are all together at home. Times like this really make me wish that we lived closer to home.

But I am so thankful to a lady that I work with who has just been so WONDERFUL to me! She pretty much has invited me into her family, which is wonderful and very inviting as well. So today I went to church with her and then went out to brunch with her family. It was really nice and I am so thankful to her for taking me in so I didn't have to spend all of today alone!

Although at times today I wish I could of just curled up in bed with Duke and wished this day away. But so far I haven't and no matter how tempted I may be to do that I won't! I will keep pushing on! My plans for the rest of the day are to hopefully take Duke for an Easter walk, work on some baby shower invitations, laundry, and hang-up some pictures in the study! Mostly just try to stay busy so that I am not left thinking. Never before have I ever looked so forward to going back to work on Monday! And every Monday that goes by is one Monday closer to Joey coming home!

Doggy Heaven

As I am writing this I am watching Duke go CRAZY. I am pretty sure that if Duke was able to tell God exactly what he wanted his heaven to look like, this would be it for him!



A lady from work told me about this park here in Killeen that has some really nice trails and a nice lake. I was excited because we all know how hot it gets in Texas, so to find a place that is closer to home that has a lake for Duke to cool off in is so great! So I got directions from her and last weekend I packed Duke and I up and off we went to explore this new place.

There are 2 parts to the park, one is a campground/picnic & beach area that you have to pay to get in. It is very nice, but Duke has to be on a leash and that is hard when you want to play fetch with him in the water. And they have people who are always supervising to make sure the rule is followed. The other part is free and has all these trails to hike. I of course decided the free route was the best route for us. I knew that if I found a quiet trail I would be able to let Duke run free. Well, we found one and the best part is it takes us right to the lake. It is perfect for him to run wild and swim. What more could a Labrador ask for besides maybe a doggy friend to go crazy with.

For me it is so peaceful, we are usually the only ones there, sometimes a few fisherman, but they are a ways away. It has become a place to go and get out of the house, get some sun and hangout with the Dukey Duke. It has become our little haven away from home.

The only thing that is missing is Joey and then it would be absolutely perfect. It will definitely be one of the first places we take him when he gets back!

UPDATE

So it has been a long time since I have written on here and A LOT has happened since then!

~First, we are no longer in San Antonio. We have moved north a couple of hours to the Fort Hood, Killeen area.

~We bought a house and have had lots of fun working on making it our own!!

~I got a job as an aide working with 1st graders and I absolutely love it!

~Joey got deployed =(
2 weeks after we had been in Killeen, Joey got news that he would be deploying at the end of February. Even though I knew at some point this would happen, I was still a mess! It is like death, even if you know it is going to happen, it still knocks you down and literally takes the wind out of your sail. But after a couple days of allowing myself to be an emotional mess, I pulled myself together, not only for him but me as well.
The month and half before he left was just CRAZY! It was a lot of him scrabbling around to get everything done. Including some major dental work which I will go into more detail in minute. During this time though we were very lucky to be able to go home and surprise both of our families. I think it meant a lot to our families that they were able to see Joey before he left.
Exactly a week before he was to leave, Joey had to go to the dentist. It is one of the pre-deployment requirements for him to deploy. Well he needed to get some major dental work done, including getting one of his wisdom teeth out.
That final week together was completely crazy. I was able to take some days off of work, which was really great. I tried to just take in every moment we had together because I knew it would be awhile before we were back together again. It was hard though because he was in a lot of pain from all his dental work and as the week went on it progressively got worse. We went to the doctor early the morning he was to leave. He tested negative for strep and they wanted to do further testing, but because this was all taking so long, Joey had to leave. I feel as if the doctor should of stopped him and said you are not going anywhere until we figure out what is going on! But that of course did not happen.
After 2 days of traveling, he finally got to Kuwait and was feeling worse then when he left. He went to the doctor the next morning, who couldn't believe they sent him in the condition he was in. Give him some medicine told him to get some rest and come back if he wasn't feeling better the next day. Well the next day he felt worse, so they took him by ambulance to a Kuwait hospital where he met with an oral surgeon. The doctor said he was lucky he came in when he did because if he waited much longer his throat would have closed, possibly causing him to suffocate. In the end he had 3 large size ulcers on the back of his throat, taking 3 tube fulls of puss from the back of his throat and then cutting them to allow any puss that was not taken out to drain. He spent 2 days in the hospital so they could monitor him for infection. During this time I was a complete mess, especially when I didn't hear from. I eventually got the Kuwait hospitals number and called it, finding out he was just discharged!
So after spending almost 3 weeks in Kuwait, recovering and getting some more dental work done he finally made it to Iraq. He has been in Iraq now for about a week and a half. So far so good, well as good as can be considering where he is. It is completely different from when he was there the last time. He seems to be keeping busy with work, the gym, and reading. He has a room all to himself, which is really nice. He has internet in his room and now has a TV with cable. He is very excited because he will get to watch wrestle mania!! He is also going to be playing basketball a couple times a week in the morning.
For me knowing that he is keeping busy helps a lot. The first three weeks was absolutely terrible, I was completely stressed, barely eating, crying all the time, and just going through the motions of everyday life with no emotion. I got so worn down I ended up getting sick with a really yucky cold. But since he has gotten to Iraq and things seem to of settled down for him, I was able to start to work on getting into a new routine to help keep me busy.
Work has been a complete blessing for me, it keeps me busy and gets me out of the house during the day! If I didn't have work I can honestly say I would probably go crazy. It helps pass the time, as my days have been flying by.
Also, my parents and Katy came for a week, during my spring break. They came ready to work as we tore out the carpet and linoleum in the kitchen, living room, and study! It looks AMAZING. Looks like a completely different house! It was also so nice to have them here, Duke was so happy and it was such a nice distraction after everything that had happened! Thanks Dad, Mom, and Katy!


Well that is what has all happened since my last post! Amazing how fast life can change. The one thing I have learned in our short time of being in the Army is that I must get used to change. Definitely, a big challenge for me, but one I am sure I will get lots of practice getting used to! We are definitely on an adventure!